Two weeks ago, we held our Closing Ceremonies. It was beautiful weather and a great celebration of 164 graduates and a variety of prize winners. I think the best speaker that day was the class valedictorian and outgoing Head Prefect, Alex Torrie. But here are some ramblings from me ...
Convocation addresses are interesting things. You
often hear references to Telemachus and his Odyssey,
or one of my favourites, Dr. Seuss’s Oh
the Places You’ll Go. Last year’s oft repeated theme was “You’re not
special”. And there is lots going around this year from the speeches by people
like the Obamas and Oprah.
I’ve attended well in excess of 50 graduations – some
lower schools, numerous high school versions, but mainly university
convocations. And I remember many of the speakers, the honorary degree
recipients: Prince Charles & Lady Diana, Presidents, Governors General,
Prime Ministers, Hollywood stars, famous musicians, brilliant minds. But what
is most strange is that I can’t really remember what they said, including at my
own high school graduation. I know that is probably more of a reflection of my
own memory than of the greatness of the speakers, but I don’t think I am alone.
So, what should my message be today? In light of my
own memories, I thought I could sit down after a minute, and that would likely
make many people very happy. But not such a wise decision in front of the Chair
of the Board, my new boss. So no, I can’t let you off the hook that easily
Two nights ago at the Leaving Class Dinner, I asked
Dr. Sampson’s advising group what they wanted to hear. One guy said, “We want
to hear that life will be a lot
easier than high school.” And while I would love to say that, it would be
gilding the lily. In fact, life will be much harder than high school, but, if you
have the right attitude, it can also be more enjoyable and more rewarding.
What I do want to say is: Thanks, and make five wishes
for you, the Leaving Class – the Senior 2s – but only Senior 2s for another few
minutes.
If you think back to the first school Assembly of the
year sitting on the floor in the gym, I asked for your patience and guidance to
show me the ropes as the newbie Principal. But more than that, I asked you to
focus on 4 things: relational leadership, empathy, acts of kindness, sense of
optimism. And especially the Senior 2 class – because you are central in
defining the culture for the whole school. By doing that you would define your
class and how you are seen, not just for these last 10 months, but for 5 years
from now, 25 years from now, and even 50 years from now, when you will have
finally qualified for a free alumni reunion lunch. And this doesn’t just apply
to how you see yourselves, but also for how all the other students at Appleby
see you, how your families see the class of 2013, and for those of us who work here
– your teachers and staff – see you.
I’m delighted to report that we’ve done the tally. We’ve
seen some “ill-advised” choices and actions; and I am certain that there even
more that we never found out about, thankfully. But, more to the point, you
have shown many, many, many examples of remarkable achievements, of compassion,
of creativity, and, most importantly, of kindness. You have been a super leaving class. Appleby is
a better place for having had the Class of 2013 lead us into our second
century. So congratulations and thank you.
I also have five wishes for you. Let me explain.
My wife and I recently attended a most entertaining dinner
in honour of close friends of ours, Michael and Kelly Meighen. At that dinner, the
speakers and performers were Senator Hugh Segal, Stratford’s Artistic Director
Antoni Cimolino, Actors Cynthia Dale and Geraint Wyn Davies, Premier Jean
Charest, and Prime Minister Brian Mulroney. Partisan politics aside, it was quite
the line-up of speakers – all eloquent, funny and charming. The guests of
honour referred to Kelly’s late father, Dick Dillon, a decorated war hero,
Colonel-in-Chief of his regiment, first deputy minister of energy at Queen’s
Park, and re-known educator as Western’s first Dean of Engineering. Michael and
Kelly said that Dick Dillon’s favourite theme was Roots and Wings. And of all the great speeches that night, and even
though they said nothing more on the subject, Roots and Wings is what I still remember. As soon as I heard it, I
recognized that is the message I want to share with you.
When I told my dear wife, who blesses me as being my most honest and forthright critic. She rolled her big beautiful doe eyes (a look I am familiar with), and proclaimed, that is so old and everyone has done it! Of course, as usual, she is correct – it far from original. In fact, while it sounds like a song from Raffi or Valdi, the phrase was originally coined by mid-19th Century US abolitionist clergyman, Henry Ward Beecher. But while my wife has the stylish new hat today, I have the microphone.
For those of you who were in Chapel this morning, you
will sense that there is some alignment with these wishes and Canon Lennox’s
sermon. You will have to determine whether great minds think alike or fools
seldom differ.
My wish is for each and every one of the 164 members
of the Class of 2013 is to have both deep, supportive and enriching roots to
nurture you, as well as broad, strong and uplifting wings to allow you to soar.
Think about that for a moment. To fulfill your
potential – and I know enough about you to say that each and every one of you has
the potential to do wonderful things in your own way, whether it be in
business, or in the arts, or in service to society, or in a profession, or in your
relationships, or in helping others, or in some other endeavor – you have immense
potential. It is our sincere hope that your Appleby experiences have opened up
your minds to the possibilities of what you can do, where you may go, how great
you are, and how much greater you can be. You have the ability and the tools.
What Wings is about for you, I would suggest, is not as much about your capacity, but moreso about the attitude and the courage to think boldly, to act audaciously. As Wayne Gretzky said, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” Trust your gut, use your intuition, listen to your hunches. Think big!
And it is also about overcoming the fear of the fact
that the route to greatness will include some fierce headwinds as well as
storms of failure and loss.
Conan O’Brien put it more eloquently when he returned
to Harvard in 2000. He said:
"I've dwelled on my failures today because, as
graduates of this place, your biggest liability is your need to succeed. Your
need to always find yourself on the sweet side of the bell curve. Because
success is a lot like a bright, white tuxedo. You feel terrific when you get
it, but then you're desperately afraid of getting it dirty, of spoiling it in
any way.”
"I left the cocoon of Harvard, I left the cocoon
of Saturday Night Live, I left the cocoon of The
Simpsons. And each time it was bruising and tumultuous. And yet, every
failure was freeing, and today I'm as nostalgic for the bad as I am for the
good.”
I think that the same
applies to many Appleby alumni. You are high achievers and are used to the
expectation of success. Everyone wants to be a winner, and is afraid of being
seen as otherwise.
However, Kareem Abdul Jabaar put it succinctly when he
said “You can't win unless you first learn how to lose.”
So part of the courage of using your wings must be the
confidence or at least the comfort in understanding that you’ll have some very
awkward forced landings along the way, and that is okay.
So whether you are a majestic eagle, or a fleet falcon
like Hadfield, or a beautiful translucent luna moth, or a crazy adventurer on a
hang glider, or an obnoxious, squawking Canada Goose, I wish for you the
courage to use your wings to be able to sail through these tree tops, taste the
clouds, and touch the sky.
But roots are equally important. Each of us is blessed
to have a foundation – an interwoven mesh of roots composed of experiences –
both positive and negative, of opportunities, love, kindness, faith and support
provided by some combination of family, friends, classmates, teachers, coaches,
and community. I have no doubt that for almost all of you, Appleby is a central
part of that collage – it is an interconnecting bond. And the Appleby roots run
both deep and wide.
As you have heard many times, they will be with you for
your whole lives. Appleby will always be a part of your DNA. Whether you want it to be or not, your
experiences here – you victories and defeats, times in the spotlight and those
in the audience, your laughter and you tears – these experiences have shaped
who you are. But just as true, you are now always part of the Appleby DNA; part
of a symbiotic continuum between 101 years of alumni and a living hive of
activity here with current students, employees and families. And I am sincere
in my hope that you and your families will stay connected; that you will
continue to support your alma mater with your thoughts, with your words, and with
your deeds. We need you.
And just as the secret to flying high is as much about
having the wings as it is about having the courage to use them, the thing about
roots isn’t so much whether you have them or not – because you all have a roots
system and foundation. I wish also that you have the self-awareness and the humility
to use your roots when you need them. To lean on others when you can do with
some energizing. To accept a helping hand when times are tough. It isn’t always
easy for someone in university to do that. Don’t be too proud. Recognize that every single person at this
ceremony has times when they must depend on others. Many of the people whom I
admire the most in the world are those individuals who are both able to reach
out and provide help to others, and equally, but perhaps more difficult, to be
able to ask for help from them. Part of this wish is for you to think about
your Appleby classmates – whether they are your university roommate or live half
a world away – to understand who needs help, and to simply be there for them in
those times. That will continue to make the Class of 2013 a great class.
So in closing, I said I wish for you 5 things:
·
Strong and powerful
wings, and the courage to use them to soar
·
Deep and nurturing
roots, and the humility to draw from them when you need support· And my fifth wish for you is the wisdom to know when to use one, and when to use the other
Finally and most importantly, to end where I began, thank
you for being a terrific class, thank you for your kindness, thank you for
guiding the newbie principal, and congratulations on this very happy
achievement.
